Laugh-Out-Loud Jokes for Kids Read online

  Knock knock.

  Who’s there?

  Ken.

  Ken who?

  Ken you come out and play?

  Knock knock.

  Who’s there?

  Itchy.

  Itchy who?

  Bless you!

  Knock knock.

  Who’s there?

  Gorilla.

  Gorilla who?

  Gorilla me a hamburger—I’m hungry!

  Knock knock.

  Who’s there?

  Ivan.

  Ivan who?

  Ivan to come in, so please open the door!

  Knock knock.

  Who’s there?

  Dwayne.

  Dwayne who?

  Dwayne the bathtub! I’m drowning!

  Knock knock.

  Who’s there?

  Walter.

  Walter who?

  Walter you doing here so early?

  Knock knock.

  Who’s there?

  Who’s Justin.

  Justin who?

  You’re Justin time for dinner.

  Knock knock.

  Who’s there?

  Wanda.

  Wanda who?

  Do you Wanda let me in yet?

  Knock knock.

  Who’s there?

  Rufus.

  Rufus who?

  Your Rufus on fire!

  Knock knock.

  Who’s there?

  Everest.

  Everest who?

  Do we Everest from telling knock knock jokes?

  Knock knock.

  Who’s there?

  Bill Gates.

  Bill Gates who?

  Bill Gates a bike for his birthday.

  Knock knock.

  Who’s there?

  Lion.

  Lion who?

  Quit lion around and open the door.

  Knock knock.

  Who’s there?

  Paws.

  Paws who?

  Can you paws for a moment and open the door?

  Knock knock.

  Who’s there?

  Zoo.

  Zoo who?

  Zoo think you can come out and play?

  Knock knock.

  Who’s there?

  Tide.

  Tide who?

  Are you Tide of knock knock jokes yet?

  Knock knock.

  Who’s there?

  Candace.

  Candace who?

  Candace be the last knock knock joke?

  Knock knock.

  Who’s there?

  Shirley.

  Shirley who?

  Shirley I’ll tell you another knock knock joke.

  Knock knock.

  Who’s there?

  Aspen.

  Aspen who?

  Aspen thinking about you all day.

  Knock knock.

  Who’s there?

  Bonnie.

  Bonnie who?

  It’s Bonnie long time since I’ve seen you.

  Knock knock.

  Who’s there?

  Andy.

  Andy who?

  Andy-body want to go to the movies?

  Knock knock.

  Who’s there?

  Isabel.

  Isabel who?

  Isabel ringing or am I just hearing things?

  Knock knock.

  Who’s there?

  Benjamin.

  Benjamin who?

  I’ve Benjamin to the music all day.

  Knock knock.

  Who’s there?

  Bailey.

  Bailey who?

  I know you Bailey know me, but can I come in?

  Knock knock.

  Who’s there?

  Byron.

  Byron who?

  There’s a Byron get one free sale at the mall!

  Knock knock.

  Who’s there?

  Les.

  Les who?

  Les one there is a rotten egg!

  Knock knock.

  Who’s there?

  Baldwin.

  Baldwin who?

  You’ll be Baldwin you’re older.

  Knock knock.

  Who’s there?

  Barry.

  Barry who?

  Let’s Barry the hatchet and be friends again.

  Knock knock.

  Who’s there?

  Carrie.

  Carrie who?

  Will you Carrie my books for me?

  Knock knock.

  Who’s there?

  Calvin.

  Calvin who?

  Calvin you get there so I know that you made it safely.

  Knock knock.

  Who’s there?

  Colin.

  Colin who?

  Just Colin to tell you another great knock knock joke.

  Knock knock.

  Who’s there?

  Orange.

  Orange who?

  Orange you glad it’s me?

  Knock knock.

  Who’s there?

  Conner.

  Conner who?

  Conner brother come out and play?

  Knock knock.

  Who’s there?

  Jim.

  Jim who?

  Jim mind if I come in and stay awhile?

  Knock knock.

  Who’s there?

  Mike.

  Mike who?

  Turn up the Mike so I can hear you better.

  4

  TONGUE TWISTERS

  Try to Say These Ten Times Fast

  Giggly gladiator.

  Fresh French fries.

  Selfish shellfish.

  Sock, skirt, shirt.

  Snatch stacked snacks.

  Cheap cheese stinks.

  Goofy gorillas gobble grapefruits.

  Tall trees toss leaves.

  Purple penguins pick pickles.

  Cooked cookies crumble quickly.

  Soggy stuff smells suspicious.

  Big bad bears blow blue bubbles.

  Tasty tomato tostadas.

  You’ll push she’ll push.

  Six slimy snails sailed silently.

  Anonymous

  A big black bug bit a big black dog

  on his big black nose!

  by Kitty Morrow

  Tongue Twisting Poems

  Billy Button

  Billy Button bought a buttered biscuit.

  Did Billy Button buy a buttered biscuit?

  If Billy Button bought a buttered biscuit,

  Where’s the buttered biscuit Billy Button bought?

  by Shirish Karker

  A Fly and a Flea in a Flue

  A fly and a flea in a flue

  Were imprisoned, so what could they do?

  Said the fly, “Let us flee!”

  “Let us fly!” said the flea,

  So they flew through a flaw in the flue.

  by Ogden Nash

  5

  SOME THINGS TO THINK ABOUT

  What do you call a male ladybug?

  Why don’t they call moustaches mouthbrows?

  Why doesn’t glue stick to the inside of the bottle?

  What do they call their good plates in China?

  Why is a boxing ring square?

  If a fly didn’t have wings, would we call it a walk?

  Do fish ever get thirsty?

  Rob Elliott has been a publishing professional for more than fifteen years and lives in West Michigan, where in his spare time he enjoys laughing out loud with his wife and four children.

 

 

 
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